500 Words Per Day – Day 9

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500 words for Why I Long for Love

 

I have tasted the fruit of love before, I am not a stranger to its sweet and chaotic flavor. It is an unimagined feeling, until it strikes you down before you stop to realize what is happening. It was devastating, but it was amazing fodder for my muse. My muse still sends blessings my way for all the creative outlet that time of life gave it. However, I wasn’t much on the receiving end of that love. I picked up scraps where I could and made a feast, imaginary most definitely, but a feast worthy of a queen no less.

I long for love to stop living on the borrowed memories of a lost love. You can only suck on the marrow of bones for so long before there is absolutely nothing to find there, before it attacks more as a poison than a hope. I want more and I know there is more out there. I live with three married couples, so I know a little something about that which I speak of.

I long for love for the passionate persona in me. She is loud and her cry is so keenly felt each day she has not found the soul she longs to compliment with her own. She is a mess, but a brilliant and quietly quelled mess…sometimes. She is dizzy with the dance of life, the crowd badgering her for answers; answers she wants only to hear from the lips of a lover. Surely not prodding strangers working their wagging tongues on her. They can solve her every problem with their pocket full of snake oil strategies.

I long for love to complete me, but not to complete my life. There is a common thread of thought, we might call it presumptions, that I am not living my life in the lieu of waiting for my mate. They are wrong. Hello woman with three jobs here, one of which is my own business. The deep desire for my other half to show up is more to do with loneliness, wanting to taste love, and the best friend of all friends than with checking off another item on my life list telling me I have lived a full and good life. I have achievements and dreams I can’t wait to watch happen with someone, not that I can’t have my own solo adventures. I have had enough solo missions though and “*enter soulmate here*” is 100% okay to happen NOW. *Looks around* It would have been astounding if it had happened right as I wrote the sentence, am I right?

Christopher Poindexter wrote this:

“I loved her, not for the way she danced with my angels…But for the way the sound of her name could silence my demons.”

When life has me face down, or people make me want to throttle them or run screaming because I can’t decide, I want that one person who can and will silence it all. I long for love because I long to love the hell out him…to exorcise our demons. There will be nothing easy about it, except the falling, but life has never fooled me with promises of ease.

 

 

ONE MORE DAY!!!!!!!

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